I have demons in me.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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