Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
