batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
