It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
