yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Randomize