What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I need to sanitize my soul.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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