Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize