Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
