This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found the puke drawer
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize