I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
