ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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