Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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