i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
