I look better un-naked...
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Randomize
