So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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