Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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