whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
It's rum buckets o'clock
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
