So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
my being single is dangerous.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize