belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Dicks are not precious.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize