And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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