Whod you bang
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
