Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize
