Pants 0. Shit 1.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize