Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
