Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
my shit smells like andre
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Randomize