apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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