i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
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I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
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I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
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