We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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