She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
