After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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