I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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