he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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