worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
