I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.