I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize