I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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