Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
is wine microwaveable?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges