Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
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