I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
