tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
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Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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