I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
