Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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