a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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