It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I spit up blood this morning
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.