C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
