Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
