btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize