Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
i now understand why vodka
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
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