I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Randomize