we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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