kristin has been a bad kristin
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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