Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
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