did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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